Take Care Of Your Number One Player

I have been writing, it’s just that I haven’t published any of them yet.

Busy out there f***ing shit up.

Mostly in my relationships.

I think my work stats are good.

My spiritual stats are lagging behind.

My physical health stats are in shambles.

I’m busy now seeing how far I can stretch and play around with my relationship stats.

I’m thinking of making new friends, it’s just that I cannot misrepresent myself, for the sake of gaining points with them.

I’m going to be as open as my offline personality is. And whoever bites, bites.

I think I’m too old to be playing make believe so I can be liked.

I just need to take better care of myself, that way I can attract better things in my life.

Like my Twitter crush for example, who inspired me to finally update this blog on our birthday month.

It’s not all gloom and doom.

Self care is essential.

You should try it too.

I love you.

Please forgive me.

I’m sorry.

Thank you.

~ Musa

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You Want My Relationship Advice?

Let me start off by saying that relationships are funny.

Not funny “haha” but funny “ya neh.”

You’ll never get it right, all the time, 100% of the time.

I’m just thankful for the educational program I was on, with books and CDS on what relationships work.

Especially introducing me to books like Personality Plus and The 5 Love Languages, in that order preferably.eysenck

The way I was effing things up in my relationship with Thube, I’m not sure why she stuck with me for so long.

But those books helped me understand her and her, me.

Maybe the one thing we had going for us was that we both wanted us to work.

Even though I was sabotaging the relationship from the fear of losing someone who made me feel so good.

Let me explain:

Growing up, I taught myself not to be attached to events or things that made me feel good.

Because there was no guarantee that I was going to get them again.

Sometimes the parents had to work their butts off so my sister and I can have a taste of the good life.

So when good came in our household – in whatever form – I registered them as temporary.

I should expect a retake for a while, if ever.

Because I’m a clingy and sensitive SOB.

So enter Thube.

The name of that chapter in my life would be “The Psychologist.”

She flirted herself into a now 13 year relationship with me, that one.2013-03-01_1244_thumb-590x400

It’s only in the past year or so that I’m STARTING to understand what makes her tick.

My love for knowledge and how things work makes this an infinite game.

I love games.

So I always try to improve where I can.

And that’s why I speak so highly about those books.

They definitely helped me understand myself better.

It helped me understand her better.

But I had to be open and be vulnerable first.

Something society sees as “unmanly.”

And as a chauvinist, humbling myself and practicing mutual respect is still a work in progress for me.

~ Musa

I Don’t Want To Be An Entrepreneur

That N word is such a burden.

It’s a cute thing to add on my social media bio that: “I’m an Entrepreneur.”

But truth of the matter is I’m on my PlayStation, while posting such on my Twitter page.

Have people thinking Musa is on “the grind.”

Kanti kuphi lapho…

Trying to promote an illusion on FaceBook, having people into thinking that you’ve got game…sh** like that will catch up to you.

Yes, I was on that stock market trading tip then the internet marketing grind. After that then it’s was the full time direct sales gig and what else…oh yeah, network marketing.

And in between that stuff, it was a 9-5.

It’s just there’s so much respect that I have for people who really run their business. Small business that they didn’t inherent. That seeing people claiming what they aren’t irks me.

It’s as if they are disrespecting the people who really are.

The businesswomen & businessmen who make those hard decisions like:

The Dream or the relationship.

Pay rent or the staff.

Full 9 hours sleep of guaranteed monthly salary or those sleepless nights not knowing whether the client will pay up on not.

People, a small percentage, really hustle out there hey?

Too busy to be posting motivational memes every 3 minutes on IG.

Success is boring.

Success is slow.

Success is consistency.

Success is long-term.

Success is worth it.

Social media allows you to post things that aren’t true.

But like all things, the truth shall out.

Live an honest life bud.

My take…I don’t want to be getting my money from only one income source.

I don’t think that makes me an entrepreneur. Or does it?

Coz that’s my endgame…

…hold up come I google.

Entrepreneur…

a person who sets up a business or businesses, taking on financial risks in the hope of profit.
“many entrepreneurs see potential in this market”

synonyms: businessman, businesswoman, business person, business executive, enterpriser, speculator, tycoon, magnate; More

  • a promoter in the entertainment industry.

    “the music entrepreneur pulled back from financing a screenplay Hopper had written”

Shoot, then that means anyone can be an entrepreneur.

But those that do the work become successful entrepreneurs… Eventually.

It compounds.

Needed to put that disclaimer there.

And that’s the rub, being successful.

You need to work.

Taking the hits of becoming good at your niche, there’s no smooth sailing in this game.

Being embrassed for a few years that will set you up for life.

You either keep getting knocked around & being made someone’s bitch at your job or learn how to make something of your life.

Even Thokozane outlined on a tweet I retweeted #NoExcuses.

You need courage & mentoring if you are looking for additional sources of income that will eventually free you from a job.

Either that or keep complaining about your BS job.

You are worth more than than s*** job you are 10 seconds away from being fired from.

You weren’t raised to be someone’s bitch.

chihuahua-running-outside

Don’t be an entrepreneur.

Be a successful one.

No matter how long it takes.

Or die trying.

I don’t want to be an entrepreneur. But I want to be a hustler. For my family but more importantly for my well-being.

Go to where you are valued. If that means getting a job then go for it.

Financially it doesn’t make sense to me to only rely on one source of income.

That’s financial suicide.

~ Musa

Replace Your S** t Habits With Good Ones

I kept on seeing and hearing the name Simon Sinek being projected in my head.

Simon Sinek.

As if stuck in the frontal lobe of my brain.

Simon Sinek.

All this, haunting, while trying to sleep.

So here I am, writing about him.

I don’t know much about him.

He was first brought to my attention by a business partner who has a background in medicine.

Google Sinek.

From the little I know of him is that he’s a speaker.

He speaks about most about leadership. On what defines a leader and what drives her. Reasons why they are true leaders. Amongst other things.

He’s available on different social media sites, I also follow him on Twitter and IG.

He’s an author as well, he wrote Start With Why.

And there are lots of videos on the ‘Tube that have he’s talks.

I think there’s a vid of one of his talks I posted in one of my blogs that I thought was awesome.

There’s a bias that comes with being a leader that I want to take advantage of.

The monetary benefits of being paid to solve problems being one of them.

It’s as if followers create problems while leaders get paid to solve them.

So I’ve been listening to some of his audios as well. Him, John Maxwell and Gary Vaynerchuk are the 3 guys I’ve been filling my head with of late.

And Eric Thomas. #TGIM

I guess I can be obsessed with certain things in my life, such as my personal development.

If I don’t invest the time for it, noone else will.

Then I will just be like the rest of them, blaming my job or spouse or community or the government or the gods for my current, undesirable situations.

Not realising that the true problem here is me.

I fix me, all else gets fixed.

It’s an inside job.

~ Musa

What Is Love…?

Banner_Backgrounds_questionsMen don’t like talking about their feelings.

Let me not generalize.

I don’t like talking about my feelings.

This pisses Thube off.

Instead of me articualting, with my mouth & voice like a normal person, that Thube on this particular daym the comment you made really upset me.

It stung even more when you kept bringing it up during the course of the day.

Making as if I out to make life difficult for you, which is the last thing I want.

But no.

Musa keeps quiet and walks around moody, being sarcastic and rude to my person.

This is because I associate talking about my feelings as a sign of weakness.

And I don’t want to be seen as weak man in the eyes of my woman.

So I don’t talk about it.

That’s very clever of me.

This obviously drops number of times we have sex because I’m mad at her and she’s not going to reward me with sex for shitty attitude I’ve been giving her.

Ending up with me considering getting it somewhere else, because I am not getting it at home…and it’s her fault…

…Very childish thinking this.

All the while, girl has no clue why I’m being so spiteful during our interactions.

And where do I expect her to quench her sexual needs when I’m being such a dick.

(See what I did there?)

This “weakness” kills relationships.

Well, it’s one of the things that kills relationships…then there’s money…but I digress.

I came to the realization of this story I’ve been telling myself while watching Tony Robbins “I Am Not Your Guru,” on the Netflix that I’ve been trying out with the night time data deals Homecloud is offering.

It gets tiring for Thube, hounding me to voice it out what’s eating at me.

The thought of her one day not coming to me, to “hound me” as I put, to only allow the rift between us grow into having us going our separate paths, shook me up.

Am I willing to have a bitch fit that leads me to losing the mother of my firstborn?

The love of my life.

My best friend.

My wife.

I decided to then drop the story I was telling myself about what my definition of being weak means.

To save my relationship.

By beginning to see communication as an essential element of what makes us a power couple. 51rV-3xwEJL._SX321_BO1,204,203,200_

The more we communicate, the stronger our bond, the more we can fill up each others love tank by communicating better with each others love languages.

The more the sex.

Communication is key.

It’s a difference between having a relationship & having a business transaction.

Because love is communication.

Musa

Being At Fault

argument[1]Need to use a more creative headline.

So I tried this as action suggestions on this “How To Win Friends” book by Dale Carnegie.

About how you know that you are not the one to blame, but you act like you are?

I forgot for what purpose though: conflict avoidance, relationship building.

Either one it’s a win for me.

Usually I come out guns blazing.

I don’t play games.

Listening to some audios or reading helps though, something I haven’t been doing lately.

Long story short, my woman locked me in at our place when she left for work and took my key with as well.

This obviously affected me when it was my turn to go to work for my shift.

I’m so cute…”affected me.”

It pissed me off, that’s how much it affected.

She knows I don’t like it when she locks me in on her way out.

To top it off, she done took my keys with.

So after calm downing, changing my state, I brought this to her attention (via text) and began apologizing.

Firstly, for making it known that I “forgot” to mention how I preferred not being locked in.

Secondly on how I was silly enough to leave the my keys in her car.

And if she can be kind enough to verify if indeed she has them with her.

So tactful I was.

She obviously replied in kind, mentioning how taking my key was not intentional.

Come to think about it, it was an honest mistake.

Just thinking now how I would have made it a huge issue when it wasn’t.

It really wasn’t because we have a sliding door that can be used an an alternative exit.

Thank God.

Heck she was even sweet enough to give me a lift back home when I knocked off.

Positive outcome all the way.

I can only imagine how things would have been if I had let my ego take control.

Sometimes it’s good to take a step back and ask, “What will Love do now?”

I love you.

Thank you.

I’m sorry.

Please forgive me.

~ Musa