Blaming It On The Full Moon

It was on a night like this. Full moon and all. Think I was waist high. Full-Moon-e1406929374981

Another fight between my parents. Sister too young to notice.

It bled out to the street. I guess the house was too small.

She’s was so Orlando, managing to throw in some licks of her own.

In the background I was hearing a voice, it sounded foreign, of someone reprimanding my dad and my mom.

That’s when I realized it was my voice. So loud, it felt wrong. To be raising my voice like that to my parents?

Mom had sister wrapped around her back with a small blanket.

But what got me was how clear the night was, outside

So clear from the light from the moon. So clear it was as if God had Her stage light on. Just for us.

I too was smacked around as well for obeying my mother when she asked me to follow her with her wanting to leave.

Heck, she was leaving. Taking evening taxi’s my aunt’s place maybe…

Never got to ask.

Mixed emotions.

Happy mom is away. But sad that she’s gone.

I wouldn’t come back if I was her.

But I want her back.

Dad managed to rip my sister from mom’s back.

Was sis’ crying?

Maybe, but this memory is not about her, it’s about me.

Why the fuck am I witnessing this.

It can’t be real.

Was smacked back reality because I endangered myself by being on road and not safe on the pavement.

But it’s not my fault I’m outside so late this evening, dude

But I’ll take it.

I’ve been taking it. For a while now so… whatever.

But why are you doing this in front of my sister?

We’re back home now.

Mom’s not here though so we’re back in the house now.

Awkward silence now.

Sister on his knee trying to quiet her.

Don’t quite down baby.

This is an outrage.

Why you calming down now?

You going to betray me as well?

Wants from with the women in my life?

Women are trash.

What now.

It’s still light out.

Sister be sleeping now.

So it’s time for bed as well.

My heart fuming. Keeping me warm from the cool breeze that was outside.

Feeling hollow.

Playing the blame game. Blame my mother. Blame my father. Blame my sister. And blaming it on the full moon.

~ Musa

When Death, Time & Love Write Back 

I don’t like movies that make me cry.

Watching Collateral Beauty starring Will Smith had me squinting my eyes.

collateral_beautyHolding my tears back with my eyelids.

It’s been a while since I’ve watched a movie like that.

Evoking so much emotions then throwing me out of wack after it was done with me.

It was Mr. Smith’s best performance to date.

Enjoyed listening to the story behind the scenes on how he also experienced loss during the making of the movie.

How he just went all out in giving it all through the film.

Can’t wait until it’s out on Blu-ray.

It’s worth the watch.

Please forgive me.

I’m sorry.

Thank you.

I love you.

~ Musa

“You Are The Average Of The Top Five People You Spend Most Of Your Time With.” – Jim Rohn 

I don’t think you should deny yourself the release that comes from venting.

But don’t make it a habit.

Otherwise you will lose a lot of your blog readers that way.

Venting identifies the problem.

So now that you have IDed the problem, what’s the solution?

I read some where that some women vent to be heard, not that they are looking for a solution from you.

I think that’s weird, but then again men have a nothing box.

I think that’s weirder.

I’m going off topic again.

What I’m saying is that the things you put in your head will show in the kind of attitude you have.

If your head is in the gutter, then your attitude will stink.

Your attitude is something that might be hard to monitor with all the junk we are surrounded with.

From external influences like the news, TV and shitty friends and family who do more to pull you down than to lift you up.

The environment you’re in plays an important role in your thinking.

And I think, for the most part, you do have control over your environment.

Thank you.

I love you.

I’m sorry.

Please forgive me.

~ Musa

Change the Way You Look at Things & Things You Look at Change

“When fate hands us a lemon, let’s try to make a lemonade”
~ Dale Carnegie,
author of “How to Make Friends and Influence People”

Sometimes when things happen, at first look like things aren’t going your way.

Only to find, in retrospect, that “things” were really pushing you in the direction of what you want and where you want to be.

For example:

The word is that BlackBerry will be doing away with their BlackBerry Internet Service (BIS) which allows for unlimited internet downloads, unlimited internet access and social networking and emailing at a charge of R59 per month (about $6.46c per month).

Unlike America we South Africans, for the most part, do not have free internet.

Data bundles need to be bought and once they are done, you’re done.

So just imagine, with the amount of time you spend downloading apps and surfing the net and social networking, how much do you think you will send per month, at a charge of let’s say $1 per 1 MegaByte?

I guess one good thing that will come out of this would be longer BlackBerry battery life, due to the lack of usage of course.

I thought to myself, after reading the breathtaking headline (without reading the actually story mind you)*, that I might as well get myself an iPhone, since BlackBerry is doing away with BIS.

Truth be told it’s the latest BlackBerry devices (BlackBerry 10) that do not cater for BIS, anything prior does. So all is not lost ☺

And if I’m going to be paying for my data services I might as well be paying for something worth my money.

Sorry RIM, I mean BlackBerry… whatever you go by these days.

But Apple so far has nicer features than you & the only thing that was keeping me on board – like most users in other African countries & India I hear – was the BIS…. Short on BlackBerry anyone?

That’s when I stopped and said, “Wait a minute. I’ve always also wanted to get myself an iPhone, maybe this was the Universe’s way of pushing me towards getting one?”

One of the ways you can attract the things faster in your life is by imagining, with as much vivid detail as possible, how happy and excited and relieved you will feel once you have the thing you want in your possession.

Something that Dr. Joe Vitale spoke about which you can read more about when you go to this previous post.

When you act as if, like in the example of “dressing for your next promotion,” you activate a law of nature known as the Law of Attraction which pulls in opportunities for you to take action on.

But you need to act like you already HAVE what you want, sincerely and repeatedly, in order for the Law to work.

The action that will lead to you receiving the results YOU want, which in the above example happens to be a promotion.

Be creative and use every opportunity you can to speak and think and act as if the thing you most desire is already in your possession.

In truth you need to find reasons to feel good, if not to feel an improved feeling, not for the sake of goal achieving – but for the sake of feeling good.

Solutions and opportunities come to you when you are seeking an improved feeling than when you whine about how awful things are for you.

As truthfully as that may be for you currently, nothing improves until YOU improve.

Which is what you want at the end of the day right?

For things to get better?

It’s an inside job.

You need to work for things to work for you.

Like the title of one of Neale Donald Walsch’s books, When Everything Changes Change Everything.

With that said…Come to papa you wonderful iPhone you!!!

Thank you.

I love you.

~ Musawenkosi Tshoaele

PS: * Links to “BlackBerry Cuts BIS” article .

PPS: Always find a way, in fact practice it often enough until it becomes a habit, to look for the good in all difficulties.

Find a reason on how you could benefit from it all.

Find the silver lining – that way the sun will always be shining for you while everything else around you seems is gloomy.

The Secret of the Law Of Attraction in Relationships

About people pleasers – Monday quote

To members of Esther and Abraham

Nina Ferrell October 25 at 6:34pm

What you are really doing, pleaser person, that you didn’t mean to do, is that you are making it unnecessary for your father to tend to his own vortex. And you’re the only one who’s going to do it, because you care so much about him.

And usually it’s the other way around. Children try to please their parents – it’s a natural thing, especially in the beginning. There’s a bigger intention brewing that, in most cases, doesn’t keep it going very long, and then parents write books like, “Where did my little girl go?…”

Let’s take lovers. If you decide that this person’s approval matters so much to you that you keep standing on your head to please them, two really screwy things happen.

First, you use them as your criteria, so you train yourself away from your own guidance system. So then that person has always got to be there and got to be consistent and that isn’t going to happen.

The other thing that happens that is equally screwy and unsettling is that you train that person into feeling good without doing the work of coming into alignment. So now they’re running around looking for other conditions to change. And that’s how the whole spiral happens. Everybody’s running around trying to get other people to change the conditions.

Stamford, CT 5/29/10


"Circumstances Are How I Create Them."

Do me a favour and stop bitching and moarning about what you are currently dealing with, because you are just blocking yourself from getting the thing you really want.


Instead of making this situation stay with you longer than it should, be grateful for it.

Because whatever “it” is, is contributing to your development.

Your are stronger today, than you were yesterday.

Be grateful for that.

That means you can take it, and by having the guts of actually admitting that you brought this onto yourself* can you rise like the Phoenix you are to change it.

“We become what we thing about.”

And it is through this change from within that you will witness how the world around you changes.

But change comes from being grateful for the growth that your current and temporary circumstances your experience is giving you.

That way you can focus more on the desired outcome, using the current, temporary circumstances as a reference.

*You attract and bring into existence whatever thought you mostly think & talk about, or its equivalent, and whatever you emotion you feel most of the time.

So the phsyical equivalent of whatever it is you feel, think & talk about will become your experience.

For proof of this look to what you have been talk, thinking about and what emotion you are associating with this, then look at your current and future experiences and see how harmonious they are to one another.

Now just image what constant gratitude for everything would do to your life…

– Musawenkosi Tshoaele

He Said, She Said

She spoke the words, “I must quit ‘doing’ and start ‘being’. We are human beings not human doings

He said, “Success in life is becoming want you want to be, not what other people think you should be. Not who you think what other people want you to be.”

“I surrounded myself with mentors and that has made all the difference in my life,” she said.

He said, “Job Security is a paradox…job…and…security

He said, “The law of attraction is exactly that, a law. So when someone says ‘The law of attraction doesn’t work‘, that person is using the law of attraction to make it not work.”

She said, “There is the conscious mind, the subconscious mind and the super-conscious mind, and if all three were to be aligned together perfectly, then you would move mountains.”

He said, “What you focus on you will attract.”

She said, “To change focus, ask yourself: What are you doing to make the situation better?”

“Faith comes from hearing some(the same thing)thing over and over and over again,” she replied.

He said, “In order to feel gratitude for what they have, they must use the law of relativity for them and not against them. So instead of looking at what they don’t have relative to someone else who is better than them, they must look at someone who is not better off compared to them.”

He said, “Faith comes from hearing and hearing…and hearing the word.”

She said, “…we are made of the same stuff. With all the same properties and abilities, including the ability to create physical reality out of thin air.”

She said, “…there are no victims in this world, only creators…”

He said, “We are a spiritual being with an intellect and emotions, living in a physical body.”

He said, “It doesn’t take money to make money. It takes knowledge and experience to make money.”

“Invest in yourself,” she said.

“Money is emotion and a thought,” he said.

“Money is energy,” I heard them say.

He said, “Whatever you think is real is your reality.”

“We attract not what we want but who we are,” they whisphered.

“The answers are not outside of you, you have to go within,” she retorted.

His reply was, “No one is ever defeated until defeat has been accepted as a reality.”

“Be you transformed by the renewing for your mind,” he muttered.

“As a man thinketh in their hearts, so is he,” she cried.

“The mind thinks in pictures and not words,” were her words.

She said, “The subconscious mind is emotion.”

“We are responsible for all of our current results,” she mumbled.

Circumstances are how I create them,” she quoted.

– Musawenkosi Tshoaele