I feared failing so much that I was running away from it. And when it finally did catch up to me, it was a horrific experience filled with negative self talk, self disgust, insecurities, and all the other intelligent, sophisticated words society has for defining feelings one should have when he has become a failure.
This fearing to fail principle, taught to during my years at school, was something I successful took with me through my earlier working life, with a certificate (in the form of my matric certificate) to prove how well equipped I was thanks to the school system…God bless them.
Now I was programmed to joyfully seek a “safe and secure” job successfully making the rich (wo) men richer. As I continue on working harder and harder at suppressing my dreams because doing anything else like taking the risk and dedicating my life to something I was passionate about, might subject me to the something I was taught to fear: the fear of failure.
And failing is not an option, I hear my high school rowing coach say, because people would see me for who I am…a failure. And the way I hold other people’s view of me above my view of myself, disappointing them will make me less of a person.
I might not have been saying this out loud but this was, after reflecting on what is was that was holding me back, it was something I had accepted at an unconscious level.
It is my unconscious beliefs that create my reality.
Yet failure is only a part of succeeding.
School is like taking natural risk takers and brain washing them into limiting their unlimited potential.
Failure is a jus t feedback of the wrong path to success that was taken, all that needs to happen is to take corrective measure to improve the plan and march forth to success.
Failure is not to be feared but expected, especially when one wants to succeed in life.
That’s how we learn in life.
How can you expect to learn if you don’t learn from your mistakes & failures.
I could say, the “secret” to success is failure.
The only time I was able to go to the next step was through learning from what life was teaching me, hearing what life was telling me through my supposed failure.
Even as a kid the only way I got to learn was through falling from my bike.
After falling I didn’t throw the bike in the bin, but got up and tried again, and again, and again, until I had myself riding like the other kids.
Persist in improving from your temporary failures in order for you to succeed, because most don’t know that “every failure comes with it a seed of an equivalent success.”
(c) Musawenkosi Tshoaele, 2010. All rights reserved